Rules of the Internet

From Bibliotheca Anonoma

The Rules of the Internet are many and complex.


Rules 1 and 2[edit]

Based on Fight Club where rule 1 is "you don't talk about Fight Club" and rule 2 is "you DON'T talk about Fight Club". These were taken and replaced "Fight Club" with "4chan". Not to be confused with the 4chan rules of conduct or the Rules of the Internet. Possibly originated during times when raids were popular at the same time trying to keep the identity of 4chan a secret. Considered a forced meme as veterans don't actually give a damn about these rules.

Rules of the Internet[edit]

Rule 34[edit]

File:Rule 34 original.jpg
The original Rule 34 macro

Rule 34 of the Internet refers to the proven fact that, if a subject exists, there is porn of it. A wordfilter was created on /b/ turning "Rule 34" into "Rule xx", where xx is a random 10-digit number. It is currently inactive.

Rule 35[edit]

File:Rule 35.png
4chan's Rule 35

A corollary to Rule 34. In the event that a perceived discrepancy in Rule 34 occurs, it is the job of the userbase of /b/ to create porn in relation to the failure. Usually takes the form of intentionally poor MS Paint edits. If there is not yet porn of it, Anonymous will go out of his way to make porn of it, so that the Internet does not collapse in on itself.

Rule 36[edit]

File:Rule 36.jpg
This is someone's fetish because it exists.

A macro of a woman covered in sticky notes with the text "No matter what it is, it is someone's fetish. No exceptions."

Rule 37[edit]

Rule 37 tells us that there are no girls on the Internet.

Rule 41[edit]

File:Rule 41.jpg
Rule 41 as seen on that fateful day

From an image posted in /b/ in which Suiseiseki, a main character in the anime Rozen Maiden who adds the meaningless word "Desu" to the end of virtually every sentence, states that the thread "Needs more Desu, no exceptions" followed by "Suiseiseki, spamming your 4chan since 2006". This image is often followed by the spamming of "Desu" over and over again.

Rule 75[edit]

File:Rule 75.jpg
Rule 75, raping your childhood since 1996.

Rule 75 is another macro rule stating that "There's always a female version of a male character. No exceptions."

Rule 78[edit]

File:Rule 78.jpg
TPB, helping keep this rule unbroken.

Another macro using The Pirate Bay in the reference to "It's been cracked and pirated. No exceptions." This rule is actually the closest to the truth than any of the other rules.

Rule 81[edit]

File:Tengen Toppa.jpg
Me will crush you. Crush you to goo.

An /a/ddition to /b/'s Rules of the Internet. Originally appeared shortly after a topic about "Rule 757" (Every anime ever made has an AMV out there to a Linkin Park song. No exceptions.) was posted, originally called Rule 810. Considered a rule since no matter how much hax any anime character will have, that character can never compare to the Tengen Toppa Gurren-Lagann, whose size dwarfs the XBox 360 and whose power is beyond maximum.

As is typical of /a/, there have been several discussions regarding Tengen Toppa's status as "the most hax", with some arguing that Giorno Giovanna is actually more powerful because his Stand, "Gold Experience Requiem" basically makes him invincible. Gurren fags acknowledge Giorno's strength, since not only is GER a broken Stand, normal old Gold Experience (which turns anything mechanical organic) is the perfect weapon against Tengen Toppa. Compromises soon occured with the two either sharing the hax crown or alternating, with the creation of a "Rule 82" to go along with Tengen Toppa's Rule 81. The debates were immortalized by an Anonymous fanart of ORT (Angel Notes), Yukaru Yakumo (Touhou) and Son Goku (Dragonball Z), all three infamously hax characters, getting their attacks nullified by Giorno's "Gold Experience Requiem", only to have GER get pierced by the overwhelming power of Tengen Toppa, which sports a grin identical to the smilie faces found at Something Awful. In another (possibly troll) edit of this comic, Tengen Toppa's drill is ineffective, reflecting how the debates as to which of the two is more hax just go back and forth.

Once in a while, these hax discussions attract the attention of the dumber Anonymous of /a/, particularly Tohno/Nanaya Shiki fanboys (or trolls in disguise) who go out of their way to make Shiki cocksucking as obnoxious as possible. Many hax discussions have degenerated into shitstorms when Tohno Shiki fags claim Shiki's hax is superior to both Giorno and TTGL for shitty reasons; these include being able to stab Tengen Toppa's dot with (and sometimes without) use of a spaceship, and defeating GER by killing the concept of "zero", thus nullifying its ability. Though little has been resolved between Gurren and Jojo fags, both fandoms enjoy the loads of lulz from lauging at how stupid Shiki fags are.

Rule 81 - All discussions of power levels will end with the Tengen Toppa Gurren-Lagann.

Rule 82 - All discussions of power levels will begin again with Giorno Giovanna.