Editing Chapter Eleven - System Shock

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== Part Eleven (January 28th)  ==


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Hey, /b/. Your friendly neighbourhood male nurse is here once more, with How do I shot Injections and lol i dunnos for all. Not a lot has happened since I last posted, but I've gotten requests to at least stay in touch, so here I am. 

I suppose the biggest thing that happened to her since my last update was a success in rehab: namely, she managed to make it up the length of the parallel beams on the walking-walkway, even if she still had to hang onto them as best she could while she did it. Her rehab nurse was right beside her the entire time, of course, and it took her quite a while to do it, but she did it herself, without needing any he;lp...and judging from the pride in her voice and face while she was telling me about it later that night, she felt, feels, pretty damn good about it, and I'm proud of her, too. I don't have a lot of experience in rehab work (something I may need to rectify for future needs...), but it doesn't take an expert to realize she's making incredible progress against incredible odds, which just makes me, well, happy. She's been continuing to origami, and is rapidly filling a shoebox so far, having gone through two replacement packs of paper so far as well, and every shape in the book I got her. It's been a good week, all in all. Questions? 

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 <span style="color:#35B214">>>re: "Just a quick update, you decided you weren't going to rape her, until you adopted her? something like that? it's been a while, anonynurse, it's good to hear from you. </span>

Uh, well, I did decide I wasn't going to rape her. I hadn't really established a post-adoption clause. As it is, I'm working on a few aspects of that (the adoption-y stuff, not the raping) at the moment, but no tremendous progress there just yet. 

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 <span style="color:#35B214">>>re: "Also, and I am obligated to ask you this -again-, Anonymous requires pics of amputee-chan/pics of something that will convince us that you're a male nurse." </span>

Well, I took a picture of my scrubs with a wrapped copy of EBA and its reciept that I got her for christmas just before it, but with my posting having 'dried up', it's still waiting to be developed with the rest of my christmas pics. 

Again, though, I won't be taking any pictures of her, or if I did, they won't be posted on /b/, in any case. I'm not enough of an attention whore to toss her to the anonymous hordes the way some other people have in the past. Sorry. 

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 <span style="color:#35B214">>>re: "So, I'm curious. Assuming there is no outside interferense, how long is Ampu-chan supposed to stay at the clinic where you work? I mean, with the old people I can accept the length of "until they die LULZ", but how does that work with someone who (conceivably) still has a long time to live?" </span>

That's the thing, there isn't generally a very well established set of procedures for people in situations like hers. While there are group homes and foster homes that accept disabled children, none of them HAVE to accept them, and when they have problems as serious as she has, they rarely will...and when they do, it rarely goes well. Group homes are run by professionals, and generally know when they can't handle a patient, and thus don't try something they think will fail miserably for them. Foster homes, and I'm talking about good ones here, generally specialize in either mental or physical disabilities, rarely both, and even the most dedicated are rarely up to the level of problems she has. 

Sure, she might get accepted into a foster home in time, as her file gets shuffled through the system, and her social worker (who I think is a pretty good one) tries to advocate for her before she burns out...but, and maybe I'm just being pessimistic, the odds of it being a successful transition are sadly low. Not impossible, of course, but...well, not good, either. 

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Thus, miracles aside, the most likely outcome for someone in her situation will be...staying in institutional care until the age of majority. Another eleven or so years, in her case. Once her physical rehab is considered sufficient, and her psychological progress having advanced further, they may try sending her to school again, arranging for the local 'handi-bus' to ship her to and from it every day. But other than that? Not much would change for her, and the life, which isn't one I'd want to live, she's living at the moment would continue. 

Horribly damaged kids aren't feel-good stories, despite what you might think. People don't like thinking about what to do with them, so they tend to disappear into the system, to their disadvantage. Shit sucks, and it isn't likely to stop any time soon, thanks to basic human nature. 

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 <span style="color:#35B214">>>re: "geez, took you long enough to update." </span>

Hey, I posted twice last week. I've been busy. 

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 <span style="color:#35B214">>>re: "Hey Nurse-kun, there's something that's been preying on my mind recently...the detail with which you described the suppository incident kind of had me a little worried...couple that with your intro post of pooper-sticking, and we've got a pretty good pedo-case against you...I'm not accusing you of anything, but I'm a little perturbed..." </span>

Well, I mentioned at the time that I wrote that as satire, but hey, suppose I can't he;lp your being perturbed, though I'm not sure why you'd be angry in particular, guessing you meant disturbed. 

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 <span style="color:#35B214">>>re: "Yay, Nurse-Kun topic! I prefer to read updates on the wiki so I can avoid the nigger floods, but I just want to say that even if this story's total bullshit, I love it. If it's not, it's epic." </span>

Well, consider this: If most people just read on the wiki rather than contributing, then I'm left rambling on in the thread more or less on my own, otherwise just surrounded by flooding fags and dickheads, which leaves me somewhat discouraged. Food for thought, hm?

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 <span style="color:#35B214">>>re: "Nurse-Kun,_  
 >I know you've been looking into information as far as adoption/legal guardianship is concerned, but aren't you getting a little ahead of yourself? I mean, it may pay to be informed, even prepared, but it seems a little on the fast side.  
 >The fact that Amputee-tan has warmed to you is a positive sign, but it seems that concerns over guardianship should first merit a serious discussion on the matter with her. And given the current stage of your relationship, it may not be appropriate to broach the subject yet.  
 >Essentially, I'm somewhat worried that your intent, which by your account is honorable, may be cast badly by overeagerness.  
 > I may of course be reading into the matter incorrectly. At any rate, I do wish both you luck in the long term, whatever form it may take. </span> 

I don't see anything wrong with being prepared. I'll admit, I still haven't come to a final decision on whether I'm ready or able to adopt and care for her myself...as I've said before, time and time again, I'm not a saint, I'm just, you know, a guy. But even so, gathering all the information I can, on both the process and how eligible to participate in it I'd be, seems like a good thing to do...must be my boy scout background acting up. 

I like to think I'm smart enough to avoid contaminating my chances with inappropriate interest...I like to, anyway.

''' 19731602  '''

 <span style="color:#35B214">>>re: "On an unrelated note, I'm curious as to how she is interacting with the other nurses now. At the beginning of your tale you mentioned she was mostly silent to practically everyone. Has your influnce extended to her being more sociable in general?" </span>

She has improved a little with the others, but not dramatically, unfortunately. Even with my attempts to try and smooth things over a bit between my coworkers, and her, I'm still practically on my own with her, so to speak. Unfortunately, having one person you can warm up to and confide in and trust somewhat rarely means that you'll feel that way about everyone else in a similar position, as I'm sure everyone here can relate to, remembering a favorite teacher, or relative, or coworker, or classmate, or whatever. 

But the fact that she's gotten better with one person gives one hope that she might get better with more in the future...just need to be patient, and stay optimistic. 

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 <span style="color:#35B214">>>re: "Continuing this topic, how does she interact with her physical therapist and psychologist?" </span>

Well, I haven't had the opportunity to actually meet her physical therapists, but from what I've heard through the nursing grapevine on the subject, she's very...committed...to the rehabilitation, but still somewhat short on 'committing' to the nurses involved in it. She isn't outright abusive or anything, but she doesn't seem to have been outright friendly with them, either, more the general way she behaves with almost everyone, even me at times, still: withdrawn, distant, hard to reach. Not 'Rei'-ish and empty, just...withdrawn. It's a pretty common PTSD symptom, particularly in kids...
 
Anyway, with our resident headshrinker, from what she's told me herself, she's a troublesome patient. Vastly more lucid and 'together' than the majority of her other patients (those being the geriatrics), but at the same time, more difficult to deal with, due to the aforementioned withdrawing and reluctance to open up to others, particularly, it seems, shrinks, which she's had a lot of in the months since the accident. She refuses to even participate in play therapy, for example, and threw the amputee doll that was procured for her, saying it 'wasn't broken enough', as it was only designed with removable legs, her particular level of...damage...not really being common enough to make said dolls to match. In any case...trouble, yes...she's been trying to arrange a setup for her to see some of the pediatric specialists at the hospital again, but navigating the bureaucracy of the companies involved has been hard work, even with some he;lp from her social worker. It's a mess, yes. 

![lol not a coincidence](1170035325673.jpg)

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 <span style="color:#35B214">>>re: image ------------> </span>

Ha, I'll come right out and admit that it was the inspiration for my origami present...I'm just glad it worked out, and that, perhaps, she hasn't seen the series, and thus didn't suspect the origins of my gift. (or some sort of suggested link to mr. prettyboy jackass in crippled kid-form, which didn't exist in my mind) 

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 <span style="color:#35B214">>>re: "What's your general work schedule (Days, Hours, etc...)? How often do you see her, and for how long? 
 >Also, when not engaged in whatever activity (EBA, Origami, etc...) what do you two do? What do you converse about?" </span>

I generally work six days a week, the 11pm-7am night shift. I have sunday nights off to catch up on sleep and do whatever I like to do, though there's rarely all that much to do on sunday nights, out on the town. She's almost always still awake when I come on duty these days, as she's admitted that she stays up to see me, and because she likes having some time to herself where she isn't surrounded by the moaning almost-dead and such (not her words, exactly). As I've mentioned before, I'm considering talking to her social worker and my bosses about volunteering some of my free time during the day some days to simply spending some time with her outside the nursing relationship, sort of like a 'big brothers/big sisters' relationship for single-parent kids. Still working up the nerve for that proposal. 

I generally let her talk about her day, vent about things that've bothered her, talk about the people around her and so on and so forth...acting as a sounding board, mostly, someone to listen to her without writing it up in her file and such, you know? She occasionally asks me about similar things, everyday events, stuff I do, what I think about certain things, etc...it's nice, really, though she is still just a kid, so they aren't the deepest conversations I could have, but they're good ones, and I really don't mind any of them in the least. I'm just happy she's opened up enough to make it a possibility in the first place. 

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 <span style="color:#35B214">>>re: "Seriously, nurse-kun how old are you?" </span>

Mid-20s. I think that's close enough. 

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 <span style="color:#35B214">>>re: "Have you talked to your cousin at all about the adoption process? How badly is the fact that you're her attendant and that you're (as far as I'm aware) single going to work against you?" </span>

Yes, I have, as I've mentioned, we discussed it at christmas, and a couple of times since. He's having lunch with a friend that works in family law this upcoming week, where he'll discuss the situation in general, and get some advice from a specialist to relay to me, hopefully... 

...well, I'm not an ideal candidate, simply for the single-person reason. But as I've pointed out before, she's a 'special' case, and they're less likely to outright reject me than they might for a more 'viable' candidate, all things considered...well, I can only hope, y'know?