Tales from IT

Thread 1

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)20:21:00 UTC+1 No.537989407 Replies: »537989870 »537990586 »538004234 »538009116

I got hired by my Dad to do IT. I know very little about IT besides games. These are my IT stories.

>be first day
>woman asks me if I can install the latest version of adobe reader
>fuck ya I got this

>DL like a boss
>"Wow you're like a computer expert"
>"Well you know..."
>Asked to input admin credentials
>forget admin credentials
>try admin:password
>nopejpg
>"uhhhh... uhhhh... oh crap somethings going on with the server... be right back"
>3 months later she still doesn't have adobe reader

More?

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)20:25:29 UTC+1 No.537989990 Replies: »537990181 »537990586 »537991061 »538000632 »538005631 »538009358

>be day 2
>angry guy is on the phone asking me about some weird in house program
>have no idea what the fuck he's saying
>there's a pause
>he's waiting for an answer
>think back to the IT crowd
>"Have you tried turning it on and off again"
>"Like restarting"
>"Give me a sec..."
>it fucking worked

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)20:29:04 UTC+1 No.537990437 Replies: »537990802 »537996957 »538001173

>day 3
>hot sales rep comes in with laptop issues
>she's 9/10 cougar
>all flirty with me
>tells me she needs something updated
>can only hear her boobs
>her laptop smells like straberrys
>download adobe reader for her and hand it back

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)20:33:46 UTC+1 No.537991024 Replies: »537991502 »537992334 »537996961 »537999125 »537999236

>day 4
>figure out how to turn off the servers
>when people start asking for help
>go into server room
>turn off servers
>come out oblivious and start downloading adobe reader
>eventually people start screaming
>THE SITES DOWN! THE SITES DOWN!
>"I'm on it!"
>run back to the server room
>play hotline Miami in the back for few hours
>turn server back on near end of day
>come out of server room
>wipe brow from face
>"I did it..."
>people are singing my praises saying i saved the day
>really just saved the girlfriend in HM

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)20:49:03 UTC+1 No.537992985 Replies: »537993131 »537994992

>day 5
>run into cougar at coffee machine
>ask her how things are going, just a general statement
>instantly thinks im talking shop
>starts telling me all the shit wrong with her computer
>she doesn't see me as a human
>she sees me as an it
>tell her to drop off her laptop
>she does
>I upgrade her ie
>download adobe reader
>restart the machine
>everythings fucking working
>run it back to her
>fix my hair
>check my breath
>act like I saved the day
>she's in her office on the phone
>she motions to put on her desk
>I do...kind of linger
>"Is that everything hun?"
>leave
>hear her say "oh it was just IT"
>just IT
>that is all I am now

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)21:07:05 UTC+1 No.537995276 Replies: »537995863 »537996374 »537996510 »538003364

>day 6
>really bored
>decide to download a gameboy emulator and play some pokemon
>the webfilters blocking it so I turn it off the whole thing I dont just whitelist it, I turn it all off
>get to emulator site but now I need to turn off the antivirus
>use the admin which I now know to do it...
>end up turning off the whole antivirus settings on the server
>download my emulator and rom
>play my game
>guy comes into my office
>"I think I caught I virus"
>me "gotta catch em all"
>by the time I'm facing Misty 4 people have viruses

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)21:12:16 UTC+1 No.537995969 Replies: »537996586

>day 7
>same guy that was yelling at me day 2 is yelling at me
>he cant remotely log in just as I am about to leave to go home
>"Try turning it off then on again then call me back"
>go home

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)21:17:35 UTC+1 No.537996668 Replies: »537997456 »538000370 »538009753

>day 8
>guy call from day 7 calls back
>he's pissed
>tells me he lost a client because of my stupidity
>"shit happens man. I lost to team rocket like 10 minute ago"
>"what the fuck are you talking about?"
>click

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)21:24:52 UTC+1 No.537997654 Replies: »537997961 »537998938

>day 9
>one of the printers is out of toner
>some fat guy tells me to change it
>"its a toner man... can't you change it? I'm working on this huge issue with the server"
>was really downloading steam
>"it'll take a second... god I have much more important stuff to do... that's why you're here"
>sigh and go do it
>can't figure out how to fucking open the fucking cartridge door
>start hitting it like they do in zoolander
>tell the poor mentally challenged guy in the mail room I have a special job for him
>he has to hide the magic egg in the chest of Hewlet Packard
>go back to my server business
>half an hour later the fat guy comes into my office
>"What the fuck did you do to the printer?"
>"Changed the toner"
>He just starts shaking his head and muttering shit
>we walk over to it
>the mailroom guy jammed the cartridge in the wrong way and actually lodged it in there so half of it is sticking out
>the door cant even close
>there's black hand prints all over the printer too
>Can feel the guy judging me so I just spew bullshit
>"Looks to be a probably with the network."
>the printer was down for over a month before I figured out we have a printer guy on call

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)21:36:30 UTC+1 No.537999228 Replies: »537999356 »537999386 »537999617 »537999839

>day 10
>have to set up projector in the boardroom
>cant find a thunderbolt to hdmi cable to hook it up to lazy to go to the store
>dont even have a corporate card either
>tell the people needing the projector that there's a compatibility issue with macbooks
>they use some guys dellbook
>the files from the mac end up not running on the dellbook
>call me in mid meeting
>all these business people staring at me as I am randomly clicking folders as fast as possible to look like I am pro
>download adobe reader
>double click files
>works
>"Thanks Anon, you saved me"

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)21:44:31 UTC+1 No.538000403 Replies: »538000602

>day 11
>there's a new hire
>no one fucking told me anything
>get screamed at that theres no computer for this new person
>go in back to see if we have any spares
>there's a few
>but there's also some really old pcs from like the early 90's
>boot it up
>works
>set up new person
>everything lags
>you open adobe reader? massive fucking lag
>send out the computer
>"it's the best we've got on short notice"
>get like 40 sharepoint tickets the first day from that person
>he's a real stickler for help
>he ends up quitting the very next week saying he can't work under these conditions

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)21:54:24 UTC+1 No.538001801 Replies: »538001991 »538002151 »538002582 »538003029

>day 12
>someones computer crashed
>fuuuuuuuuck
>set up computer
>remember something about profiles being saved on the network
>go back to the server room
>look at the server rack like a total idiot as I try and figure out in my head how this works
>tell the guy all his data is lost and there's nothing I can do
>"b-b-bbut my project... i have to present that to the board on friday..."
>"gone, man. It's gone"
>play sim theme park the rest of the day

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)22:09:56 UTC+1 No.538003978

>day 13
>roll up to work an hour late
>whole office is in chaos
>fallofrome.jpg
>"HE'S HERE!"
>Go in to my office open up mail
>dozens of emails like:
>"Hey is there something wrong with the server I can't log in to..."
>"Any idea why the site is down I..."
>the server is actually down
>adobe reader can't save me now
>"Just go back there and do what you did last time!"
>everyone thinks its an easy solve
>literally shaking in the server room because I don't know what to do
>nap in server room for entire day
>people are pissed can hear them banging on server door
>we've missed deadlines
>leave at 6:30 pm
>the CFO sees me in the parking lot
>hes been in a meeting all day doesn't know about my struggles
>"You're still here?! That's the kind of can-do attitude I like to see"

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)22:16:37 UTC+1 No.538004926 Replies: »538005196 »538005209 »538005270 »538005631

>day 14
>server is still down
>my dads asking questions
>everyone is pissed
>take an early lunch
>over hear some guys at the restaurant talking about buying a new modem for the office
>hailmary.jpg
>"Hey sorry to bother you during your lunch...but would either of you happen to be IT?"
>before either of them could read me the riot act and tell me something like how the fuck dare I
>I'm IT too
>I show them my hand that I scratched up crawling wire on the floor
>they nod
>"What would you try doing if your server is completely fucked?"
>"Have you tried restarting it?"
>I go back and restart the physical machine
>it fucking works

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)22:22:06 UTC+1 No.538005784 Replies: »538006516

>day 15
>hot cougar walks by office looking distressed
>"Everything okay?"
>"Oh good... I cant log into my email... can you please help me... PLEASE"
>"I got you."
>get her laptop
>re-install microsoft office
>outlook works again
>poke through her emails to make sure things are working
>send a test file
>read the titles of her latest emails
>"Divorce"
>hand back her laptop
>"Looks like its working now"
>"Thanks..."
>"Everything okay?"
>"Well..."
>this is fucking it, tell me your sob stories cougar woman and then its on
>"My mouse is acting a bit funny, can I get a new one"

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)22:33:21 UTC+1 No.538007465

>day 16
>one of the mailroom guy's monitors isn't working
>it's coming up all green
>backstory: there's been a huge misappropriation of funds because I gave him dual monitors just because he's a mentally challenged and I figured if anyone needs 2 screens its him
>all he does is look at msn slideshows
>and use the fedex webapp or something
>he's a nice guy so I actually try and fix it for him
>nothings working
>think its a driver issue
>think its a setting issue
>think its an actual hardware issue
>whole time people are coming to me with real problems but I keep saying "I'll be there in a minute"
>after 2 hours the mailroom guy goes
>"maybe da pug ish boken"
>I swapped out the hdmi cable with a brand new one
>it worked
>I officially am less adept at my job then a poor mentally challenged guy

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)22:43:12 UTC+1 No.538008829

>day 17
>nice old woman who talks to me about sports tells me her keyboard is shit
>she's oldest person in the office by far
>old as dirt
>tell her I have just the thing
>go in the back and unbox a brand new keyboard meant for the programmers
>bring it to the old woman
>"You're such a helpful young man"
>reach down awkwardly to plug in the new keyboard
>get back up and dust pants off
>old lady looks like she's having a heart attack
>look at the screen
>it's fucking blank
>on my way back up to my feet I hit the power button
>she lost 3 hours of work
>3 hours that old woman will never ever see again

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)18:17:40 No.538013416

>day 18
>company meeting
>were over budget
>there has been ridiculous spending
>"we've lost money for almost a month..."
>day 18
>almost a month
>they are going to out me
>IT budget comes up in discussion
>were one of 2 departments that are coming under budget
>"Great job Anon. I heard about the server issues here... you're the man"
>at the end of the meeting a 45 year old events planner asks me if I fix computers on the side
>"Not really..."
>"Oh... I have this one blasted thing that needs fixing. You couldn't just come over and fix it?"
>bullshit
>for a laugh I say, "yeah it's cool, just give me your address and I'll be over after work"
>not sure if I'm getting sex
>buy condoms
>she's not that hot like a 6/10 tops
>not even going to lie
>last call kind of hot
>arrive at her house
>ring the door bell while standing all suave leaned up against the door
>her husband answers the door
>shows me to the computer
>install the latest version of adobe reader
>get $20
>go home

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)23:23:20 UTC+1 No.538014162

>day 19
>some guy crashes a program so I have to reinput the settings
>go onto his cubiclemates computer
>check settings
>2 hours later
>"You wrecked my computer...lwant my fucking computer back exactly how it was... I don't know what you did but somethings off...my usb drive is buzzing..."
>wtf
>I didn't do shit to your computer. I checked a program you open 20 times a day
>super pissed so I go back into the server room and play Thomas Was Alone
>hear knock on server room door
>it's the cubiclemate
>"Hey, Thanks for fixing it."
>"Fixing what?"
>"The my usb drive"
>I didn't do shit lol
>"Oh yeah... don't mention it"

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)18:31:29 No.538015293

>day 20
>spend entire day cleaning the server room up
>getting it all nice
>just unplugging network cables Willy nilly so I can colour coordinate them
>people are losing their shit
>they are randomly getting kicked off
>tell people there are some issues with our isp
>I make sure to say I-S-P as I have now learned by speaking in abbreviations no matter how common makes you sound techy
>by the end of the day the server rack is all classy looking
>unfortunately I never mapped anything and a handful of people cant connect because their ports aren't connected to anything
>tell them the I-S-P will have it done ASAP and go home

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)18:38:28 No.538016156

>day 21
>now that the server room is all clean I set up all the test boxes in the back
>8 machines in total all connected to the network
>try joining monitors all together like you see on cool threads, you know like the racing ones?
>realize these are shit old monitors and you cant do that
>come up with the great idea of bitcoin mining with these boxes
>set it up for the first half of the day
>after lunch I'm mining
>terribly but I am mining
>people start complaining about server lag
>blame the lag on the olympics
>suggest that the whole office must be streaming it
>ban the olympics on the web filter
>office is divided; can see the divide in my email
>people who are pissed about not being able to watch the olympics
>and the keeners who think its all work and no play at work
>I've officially gained power though, people respect me for making this mandate
>"He's a real company guy"

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)23:42:25 UTC+1 No.538016735

>day 22
>its birthday day
>office celebrates all the months birthdays
>take cake
>set up n64 in the boardroom
>challenge people in the office to goldeneye
>keep saying "Hey I'm just taking a 5 minute break for some cake... want a quick game?"
>own the shit out of all of them
>realize I did absolutely nothing all day but eat cake and game
>no one ever noticed

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)23:47:35 UTC+1 No.538017463

>day 23
>cougar calls in from the road
>she's having trouble accessing a key app for a client on her ipad
>she tells me its name
>have no idea what it is
>but make sure to sound astute
>ask her if she's using WIFI or 3G
>"How do I check"
>"Nevermind let me check from my maincore system"
>google the app but nothing comes up
>ask one of the other sales people
>"oh it's just an infographic on our main site"
>tell the hot cougar to come into the office because it's going to require me to hardcode the changes in
>she drives 2 hours to come to the office so I can open up Safari and bookmark it to her ipad homepage

Anonymous (ID: ZW6GgnJ3) 03/19/14(Wed)18:56:07 No.538018694

I'll continue this tomorrow, believe it or not there's an ending to this but I can't get to it today.

>day 24
>people heard from the 45 year old events planner I do house calls
>bunch of idiots are bringing in their home computers, mobile devices, anything technical for me to fix
>tell people I can only do it after hours and I charge $20 for small stuff and $50 for large.
>most of it is simple fixes
>windows updates or adobe reader installs fix it
>but then I get it
>the laptop from hell
>this fat indian guy hands me his laptop in a plastic bag, not a laptop bag, a plastic one
>"What's wrong with it?"
>"You tell me genius"
>Load it up and it's asking for some system restore or something.
>just hit next and okay
>fixes it but it says I need to load chkdisk?
>figure that has something to do with the cd drive
>open it up
>there's a thick fucking layer of bread crumbs in the tray
>tilted the machine to its side
>motherfucking bread crumbs just pouring out of the laptop
>restart the machine
>it loads perfectly
>turns out the guy was using it as a tray for his morning bagel
>fucking toaster laptops

Thread 2

Anonymous (ID: I9PWPzZB) 03/20/14(Thu)17:27:40 UT

Hi /b/ ifs the IT guy from yesterday

>day 25
>even though I'm shit at IT
>one guy thinks because I am IT I am super techy
>he asks me what my favourite browser is
>"Google...Ultron"
>"Is it like chrome?"
>shit thats what I meant
>"yeah...but better...it’s what nasa uses"
>"cool could you dl that for me?"
>gulp no worries'
>literally start the mouse back and forth so fast you can't see the cursor
>then ctrl alt deleted into task manager
>"there....you go. All done. It looks like google chrome, but it's really ultron, no one else can tell."
>to this day he still thinks he runs google Ultron


>day 26
>some woman calls me over
>"it'll just take a sec, its super simple"
>shit
>asks me to hook her up to a new printer
>she hops out of her chair and lets me sit down
>forget how to add network printers
>her and her friend are talking right over my shoulder staring at the screen
>Is this going to take long?"
>I fake deep thought as I stare at the screen with one hand on my temple
>"Anon? I have a deadline is this going to..."
>"What the fuck..."
>both of the women are startled
>'THERE'S A VIRUS ON THIS MACHINE"
>and I just storm off like I'm pissed

>day 27
>learn about a remote access tool that the whole office uses
>decide to haunt the old nice old lady from before
>i randomly move the mouse for a few hours
>she struggles to do basic tasks
>she comes and asks me for a new mouse
>oblige her
>hook it up and leave
>look back at remote tool
>mouse is moving again, she opens up word
>I begin to type
>"Hi"
>no response
>"Hi"
>"Hello? Who is this?"
>"It's death :("

>day 28
>a guy asks me to burn him a copy of a dvd for a presentation
>holy fuck I know how to do that
>burn it for him
>march back down to his office, proudly holding the dvd high in the air
>Woman tries to stop me "Hey can you..."
>"Not now... I've got IT business to attend to"
>hand the guy his burned dvd
>this might be one of the first things I've done right here
>tear in my eye
>so proud of how far I have come
>I am true IT
>5 minutes later I get a call "Hey...yeah there's nothing on the dvd

>day 29
>give new hire her new laptop
>nothing is fucking setup right
>forgot to hook up her outlook to exchange
>no worries she did it herself
>cool
>she asks me if I can type in the admin credentials so she can dl some social media tool
>"Sure"
>fuck up the login credentials like 3 times and get locked out
>have to unlock it from my machine
>can't figure it out but go back because I left my gameboy in her office
>she starts making small talk
>"So where'd you go to school to become an IT person?"
>she's fucking on to me
>try logging in once more to admin account
>locked out still
>"Yeah... you know what? I think this Hootsuite extension is a virus. I don't want that shit on my network"

>day 30
>here's where shit starts to really hit the fan
>as you know i had setup a bitcoin mining rig in the server room
>it was just eating up all the bandwidth
>the whole network was barely operational
>and now because of my ineptitude and blaming things on viruses people started a rumour
>that the whole network was being attacked by a rogue hacker group
>after lunch I get pulled into a meeting by with all the execs
>the jig is up
>"As you know we've been experiencing a multitude of issues with our network
>fucked
>"from the lag to the viruses"
>so tucked
>'We want you to head up the investigation and find out who's doing this and why"
>ROFL
>I am the fucking dirty cop on the force who's tasked with finding the dirty cop
>I am the fucking law

>day 31
>tell people fm running server calibrations
>"ifs like dusting for finger prints"
>no ones the wiser
>show this one middle aged guy with a beard how to use a webapp
>go to favourite it for him and put it on the toolbar
>notice all of his favourites
>Big titty housewife
>Pajama Butt Slut
>Mexican girl on bus
>mouse over them as I mouth read them
>he starts freaking out
>begs me not to tell
>"Why shouldn't l?"
>"I’ll buy you lunch"
>got 10 chicken nuggets

>day 32
>for some reason the entire office is having to fill in a captcha every time they google anything
>have no idea why this happening
>Google ultron guy asks me if this has to do with the virus and if he should be backing up his data
>"First. Always back up your data."
>he nods to my tech savvy
>"Second. It's a security measure I've put in place. There are robots afoot."
>he nods again like my word is law

>day 33
>Ultron guy blabs and tells everyone about google ultron
>now everyone in the fucking office has a sharepoint ticket asking for it to be installed
>a few of the more competent people are asking me what the fuck google ultron is
>I just give them finger guns until they walk away
>have to spend entire day going from desktop to desktop pretending to dl google ultron
>literally spend 3-4 hours pretending to dl software that nasa uses
>one girl asks me if this even legal
>"Are you a cop?
>she reports me to HR for "criminal like behaviour"
>have already explained to HR what google ultron is...
>HR thinks its real
>HR thinks nasa uses it
>HR tells the narc to stop interfering with important technological matters because the narc doesn't know anything about IT like me
>doesn't know anything about IT like me

>day 34
>been playing portal 2 all day in my office
>haven't heard so much as a complaint
>haven't had to update adobe reader or adobe flash all fucking day
>something's not right
>no one's said shit about it
>poke my head out of the office
>everyone's heads down just typing away
>starting to get worried
>ask a guy how his computer is working
>"Great. Ever since you downloaded Google Ultron, my whole computer has just been flying"
>wtf
>do a quick google search on google chrome
>supposedly it automatically downloads the most up to date versions of adobe
>omfg
>if I don't have fucking adobe reader I'm fucking out of a job
>send out mass email
>ATTN: do not open google ultron it has been hacked
>spend rest of day uninstalling and making IE the default browser

>day 35
>people are becoming restless with the hacker/virus stuff
>they wonder why I haven't solved the case yet
>some even believe its not a hacktivist group like I've been hinting
>"We're not just dealing with amateurs here. Were dealing with the best. And that's why I need to update your antivirus scanner"
>just to strike the fear into people I covertly turn on the computer of a person who's sick and stationed right in the middle of one of the larger areas
>turn off her monitor
>put speakers full
>then go back to office and remote in
>play Wham's Jitterbug at 3 second intervals throughout the day
>eventually people start coming to my office to report this
>I nod
>Its worse than I thought"
>"What? What is it?"
>Its the Jitterbug gang. One of the world's best hacking groups"
>"I've never heard of them."
>That's why they're the best."

>day 36
>check messages
>local police called
>FUUUUCK
>need to speak with me since I am IT about recent hacks on our organization
>delete message
>cougar comes into my office
>asks if I can adjust her desktop so the wallpaper changes every couple of minutes
>"Sure."
>head over there with her
>she tells me she's getting a divorce
>"Oh."
>Says she's actually starting to date again and its pretty awkward
>fuck it
>“Wanna maybe grab a beer sometime after work?"
>she laughs
>"What? I mean why not?"
>"You're joking right? You're IT..."
>my eyes well up as I stare at adobe prompts me that reader has a new update
>"Just gonna download this."

>day 37
>feeling like shit today
>cougar told her sales friends that I tried asking her out
>people are laughing behind my back
>can hear the whispers
>"ewwww hahah IT?!!! ewwwww"
>want to just open up a computer and jump through the moving cpu fan
>mean sales guy who usually calls (yeah that one) stops by office
>"My laptops not working"
>I trudge over to his desk with him
>hit the power button for a reset
>don't say anything and just walk away
>"If that's all you ever do.. Why do we need you?"
>turn around
>"what?"
>"if you only ever just restart my computer... why are we paying you? I can restart my own damn computer"
>grin
>"Have you ever repaired a server here? Do you know how hard it is to get it operational? Remember how we were down for a day and a half?"
>he shakes his head
>'That's what I thought."
>of course I just restarted it lol

>day 38
>still feel like shit after the cougar shut me down
>decide to block 1 major site on the webfilter every hour
>feel like the Joker doing it
>first youtube
>then ebay
>then reddit
>hear the moans from people as they read my webfilter note
>This is a place of work not a fun house"
>One woman storms into office
>'This is not funny...this is serious"
>'Why so serious?" I ask her
>"I need you to unblock ebay"
>lol seriously
>"I HAVE AN AUCTION ENDING IN 5 MINUTES!"
>put it back on the safe list
>but it was too late
>she missed out on her cellphone case
>mwhahahahaha

>day 39
>an "investigator" comes to the office
>the execs were worried that we had too much to lose and wanted to bring in a professional
>I'm fucked
>show him around the office
>he keeps asking to see the server room
>And this is Carol. She's a riot. Aren't you Carol"
>doing everything I can to stall
>we go back into the server room
>he compliments me on how neat the cables are
>think about picking up a monitor and bashing his skull in and then running away to mexico
>can't do it
>I'm not a monster
>I'm IT
>the guy goes onto the server
>asks me for the login info
>figure the jig is up
>give it to him
>he logs in
>opens up IE
>looks over his shoulder at me
>"You don't need to be here"
>"It's fine"
>I need to be there when it happens
>he literally starts shaking his mouse really quickly around IE clicking on random parts of the screen
>I know because a popup for Home depot came up
>he starts muttering to himself... "hmmm... hmmm"
>watch him type in adobe reader in google
>he dl’s it
>swings his cursor around some more
>and then finally goes
>"fucking hackers right?"
>we are brothers he and I
>IT brothers

>day 40
>wake up and realize how lucky I truly am not to be fired or worse
>see cougar girl walking into the office from parking lot
>asks me how things are going
>I think we finally put an end to the jitterbug gang
>"no, I meant... not work stuff'
>look at her strangely then smile.
>"Oh you know how it is
>she flicks her hair and then laughs
>what the fuck?
>"Cool. I'm having problems opening a file can you open it for me hun?"
>sigh
>"Yeah sure..."
>we walk into her office she's being all flirty
>click on the sharepoint link of a pdf file
>won't open
>download adobe reader
>while its loading I ask her what she's planning on doing on the weekend
>"I'm going to the mountains with this guy for our first getaway"
>stop adobe reader at 80%
>walk right out
>I am IT

>day 41
>this hot yoga girl from events comes into my office
>her keyboard keeps typing in french
>too busy playing flappy bird to care
>"so are you going to help me?"
>“if things slow down. Eve been swamped today"
>"I'm going to fucking kill you”
>she waggles her glorious yoga butt away
>cute girl. and don't even care anymore just want day to fucking end
>I hate this fucking job
>all I do is get yelled at abd download adobe reader
>I can't even find the joy in games any more
>Dad walks by
>sees I'm looking blue
>Dad takes me out for lunch
>pats me on the shoulder
>"I'm so proud of you son."
>to date the company is in fucking shambles
>and I still am primarily an adobe reader downloader
>but I wouldn't change any of it for his very next words
>"I love you son."

Thanks guys and thanks Dad for the job. :)

Don't forget to download your adobe readers guys.